I Said YES! | The Proposal Story

First, I want to say THANK YOU so much for your sweet messages and comments on my IG post announcing the engagement! I was quite literally overwhelmed by your support, and apparently so was my message requests folder, so my apologies if I missed your DM.

ABOUT US

Whitney and I have “met” a few times. The first time we met briefly years ago when she was dating someone else. The next time was in 2014 when she moved back to Memphis from Atlanta. We were both in a GroupMe with mutual friends where we all shared daily news, pop culture, and memes. The two of us couldn’t have been more different in our thinking about everything from politics to local happenings and basically came for each other’s necks every day. Looking back, it was pure comedy. Folks in the group would drop gifs egging us on.

The one thing we could always agree on, besides food, was our shared interest in the arts. We would both drop arts events in the group and usually be the only two who would show up. Once it became apparent that we were going to keep running into each other at these events anyway, we decided to attend an art opening together and had the best time. From then on, we became each others plus one for everything from outdoor concerts to the ballet. We started riding together to events and realized that we lived a literal five minutes from each other. This news increased our hanging out to hitting the farmers market, grabbing dinner together, and co-working on our side projects at different coffee shops.

Before I knew it, I had developed a crush. EXCUSE ME? How? I’d once been named “queen of the first date” because I was known for quickly losing interest during a date and rejecting a second one. I was also booked and busy with working two jobs, generating content for what would eventually become this blog, freelance writing, volunteering at the farmers market, being active in a community organization, completing a leadership training program, and generally being disinterested in the drama that I saw friends experiencing while dating. So I did what any mature person would do and pretty much ghosted. SHAME ON ME, I know. Whitney reached out after a bit asking if I was okay and if something had happened. I had no idea how to say that nothing had happened except she had managed to melt my cold heart.

We eventually had the we like each other conversation then the we go together conversation then the let’s live together conversation then the what kind of ring do you want conversation. Deciding on a ring was a struggle for me. I’ve never been the girl who looked at bridal magazines and dreamed about a wedding. I hadn’t even thought about how my engagement ring would look. I ended up scrolling hashtags on IG and checking out Pinterest to get an idea of what I would want. I fell in love with a few vintage rings but also surprisingly found myself liking some trendier rings. Eventually, I took stock of my personal style and realized I wanted to keep it simple with an oval cut and a plain gold band, so that’s what I reported back. I had no idea when the proposal was coming or the final design of the ring.

THE PROPOSAL

Life as we know it changed for pretty much everyone last March. Spending the last year in quarantine, adjusting to shortages at the store, worrying about our health and the health of others, and the general day to day stress took a toll on both of us. We were definitely privileged in that we were able to work from home and very rarely had to be in contact with others but we were both anxiously anticipating our anniversary as a day of celebration. Since we hadn’t dined inside of a restaurant in nearly a year, we kept going back and forth on whether to have dinner at our usual anniversary spot or just cook at home. I got a bit obsessed about the idea of going to dinner and started looking up places with patios. I guess I was driving Whitney crazy because I was eventually told to chill and she would make a reservation somewhere. Those of you who know me IRL know that I have zero chill when it comes to nailing down the details for plans but I tried my best.

Looking back, I should have known something was up because Whitney was acting weird for a month or two leading up to our anniversary. She was super stressed and disappearing from the house. She even told me the week of Christmas not to expect a proposal, which was weird, because I had already made it clear that I didn’t want to be proposed to on a holiday or my birthday.

Two days before our anniversary, she let me know that we were going to have afternoon tea at 17Berkshire for our anniversary in addition to a dinner later that night. I was so excited because I love tea and I knew the owner, Nuha, would make sure it was a safe and fun experience. I was also stressed because I couldn’t figure out what to wear. I’d picked out a dress for dinner weeks ago (I told you, zero chill) but hadn’t planned on needing a second outfit. I tried on an outfit with some cute strappy heels that Whitney quickly vetoed. I was so offended and started arguing the case for these being the most amazing shoes that had been sitting in a box for months because I had nowhere to wear them. She just kept laughing and insisting that the shoes were cute but she didn’t think I should wear them. I finally settled on wearing what I basically wear every day in the fall/winter and decided that would have to do. Who would I be seeing at tea, anyway? Ha!

I woke up the next day ready to start celebrating. Whitney had already let me know that we would have to make a stop, which I was mildly annoyed about, but decided I wasn’t going to start the day with my usual twenty questions. She works with entrepreneurs and told me she needed to meet one in Overton Park because it was a good halfway point. We drove to the park and parked but I didn’t see anyone around. She hopped out and I immediately started looking around to see who she was meeting.

Since the person hadn’t arrived, she asked me to get out and wait with her. Out of nowhere, I hear music playing. I thought she was playing music from her phone because she does that sometimes when we’re waiting on things. Turns out she was playing it from a hidden speaker. As we walked, she was being her usual sentimental self and talking about how much it meant to be at our fifth anniversary. Before I knew it, we were walking up a slight incline, which is why she vetoed the strappy heels, and then it happened. She got down on one knee and proposed. I just kept say, “NOOOOOOOOO! OMG! NOOOOOO! What are you doing?”

Talisha, the photographer, popped out from behind some bushes and I could not stop laughing. It was all just so sweet and happened so fast. I couldn’t believe it. After calming down a bit, she snapped the beautiful photos you see in this post then we headed to tea.

Whitney surprised me by inviting my cousin Chiedza to tea. She is basically my big sister, counselor, the person I call for advice, and the person most likely to tell me to get over myself and make sh*t happen. It was so special having her there to celebrate our special day. Whitney’s sister joined us later and their parents did a drive-by with their congratulations. We had so much excitement that morning and afternoon that we ended up deciding to pass on our dressy outfits for dinner and just go casually. We cheers-ed again at dinner over pasta. It was the perfect day!

THE RING

For those who have asked, I tagged the jeweler on this post. I absolutely love my engagement ring. Whitney added details on the band and also included a ruby, her birthstone, underneath the setting. I loved the attention to detail and that she added a little extra something. It was important to her to work with a black jeweler on the design. She worked with L.A.-based designer Maggi Simpkins. COVID-19 threw off plans for a visit out there  and meant the process had to be completed virtually. Luckily, Maggi made sure that Whitney was kept in the loop with 3-D renderings and photos. The final ring was approved by Whitney, her brother Chris, and our dear friend, Jasmine.

//PIN THIS FOR LATER//

This was a long one so thanks for reading! Want more wedding content? Drop a comment letting me know. I don’t usually share so much about my private life or relationship but am willing to take you along for the ride of wedding planning during a pandemic, if you’re interested.